Cigar Bar

“So, how ‘bout that ‘happy ending’” Asked Brian. 

He was reclining in one of the big leather chairs at Smokey Joe’s (no relation), a local cigar bar we frequent.  It is paneled in dark wood, with leather chairs and low tables.  A bit more sports memorabilia than I like, but if you come in on a quiet afternoon it has a nice ambiance.  I sat down next to Brian.  We were in a quiet corner of the lounge, by ourselves. I brought a double scotch from the bar.

“You paid more for that scotch than I did for your, ahem, services”

He was trying to make a point, and it was a good one.  I’ve been out looking for an affair, and my friend Brian, the legal master mind, has suggested hiring a professional.  I looked at my scotch.  A double shot of a good single malt – probably $35.  I had to think about this.

“You make a compelling argument.” I paused.  “Seriously, how much?”

“25.” He nodded, “plus tip.  You did tip her right?”

“Yeah, I gave her a C-note, almost gave her 2”

“I knew you’d like her.  So now we can forget all this affair stuff.”  He took a deep drag on a thick cigar. “Although, that was an inappropriately large tip.”

“Naw”, I replied while lighting my own cigar.  “I want an affair.  That was just the thing I needed to push me into acting.”

“You’re crazy,” he raised his glass and gave me a crooked smile, “Let’s hope you don’t get into too much trouble.”

I met his toast.  “To swift bailbondsmen” I said a little bit too loudly.

“I know some” he replied